Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Works Every Time

Used airline blanket: $5 (if you're flying Continental). Bottle of Smirnoff: $25. Easily defeating any organic alien race that thinks of invading Earth: priceless. In certain circumstances, depending on the energy exchange mechanisms of the invading organism, Smirnoff can be substituted with Ritalin, tobacco, Novocaine, oxygen or even sugar. And of course, if smallpox is unavailable we can always use the flu or streptococcus, those are immune to almost anything these days. If the alien does not accept blankets, try to make them try raw unsterilized eggs or not airport sushi. If the alien is a humanoid, sex is always a great way to transmit all kinds of infections.

Yes, I do in fact spend time thinking about this kind of stuff. And I try to instruct my brother as to what to do in an alien invasion. Let's face it, it's much more likely than a zombie invasion.

I think i'll start using my brother in my comics more often. He's fun to draw, and doesn't do much fun stuff so the comics might entertain him. Plus, he needs a shave.

OK all, peace out! And happy 1st of June.

3 comments:

Rachel said...

While it is more likely for an alien invasion have you ever thought of this: What if it is aliens that carry the disease that creates zombies... had a dream like that once... to get them to give us the vaccine i had to show them the wworth of human life. How did i complete such a task? comics. got them hooked... no joke... not sure if it was garfield or the manga or what but they forked that vaccine over in no time.... just thought you should know. lol

AK said...

hm well, all we need is germ-infested manga (available at your local library), and a sizeable repository of manga on a flash drive, which would also be discreetly infected with a virus that will shut down the aliens' communication systems. it's so nice to have a nice good conversation about this finally ^_^

Matt said...

If you work on the alien invasion problem, I'll work on the asteroid apocalypse problem