WE HAVE OFFICIALLY MOVED

THE MOVE IS COMPLETE TO:

http://pathetichumancomic.blogspot.com/

Please if you follow this site follow the other one as I will not be posting here anymore.

If you wish to stop following, sure thing, and thank you all for being readers of this comic. :)

The Professor Trap

It's true for everything. seriously, I think if you want to run for president, serve free pizza at all your gatherings and speeches and such.
On that note, have a good night folks! i'm gonna go sleep.

Whitemail

For the new post, see http://pathetichumancomic.blogspot.com/

Target Acquired

As you know, the comic has moved!
The complete post is at http://pathetichumancomic.blogspot.com/

Ninja Strike

Aaaah...fully converted to Adobe Illustrator. BIG NEWS GUISE! The comic is being renamed and moving to a new URL, because I am sick of embarrassing situations with the other 4 AM comic which shall not be spoken of. The site is currently under construction, it's also a blogspot for now.
Here's the link: http://pathetichumancomic.blogspot.com/
The comics will start probably at Comic 80.
If you read and/or follow this comic, please please please follow the new site. This site will soon be shut down, as soon as I figure out how to do that.
Thanks for your patience people, you know I love you if you read this, and if you don't also. :)

Peace out!

Impropaganda

what's cooler than an alien knowing how to promote himself in an election? an alien who does it wearing snappy ties.
in other news, i miss doing lines in photoshop, so i decided to draw a little something extra the old fashioned way today. that's right, it's the first ever BONUS DOODLE! doodles are necessary byproducts of my doing any kind of artwork, but sometimes they actually turn out pretty nice. so here's one. it's called, Anna at the Lab, and it's dedicated to all the lab peeps who put up with me, and especially to Brian Wall, the lab beast who actually reads my lame comics.

Doing It Like Bill

You know what's scary? Kids born after 2000 don't even know who Clinton is. They don't even remember that crazy election where Bush won. /sigh/
Anyway, an exponentially better attempt in illustrator. I am sticking with this. It's gut, und gut for me! :]

I got work early tomorrow, as seems to be the case whenever i have to pull a late night, so peace out!

All the Qualifications

LEARN FROM THIS, ALL YOU POLITICIANS. Please the gunslinging dumasses, throw some cash around, drop some sexy tidbit from the past. Well, at least they have the male model part down pat.

In other news, this comic looks different. This is because it was done entirely as vector art in Illustrator. I made the switch because my wrist declared, in the form of an agonizing pain dart, that it will not do any lineart until the tendon fully heals. I don't like having to change my drawing habits all in one go, but my wrist is thanking me right now by actually not hurting!

So that's how I'm going to draw comics for now. Excuse the crappy first attempt, art quality hounds. But enjoy the joke...and the sexy body of Gloz the Alien senator.

Peace out!

So simple a senior citizen can do it.

Oh my god, the facial expressions on the little guy were so fun to draw. And if the Terminator, a peanut farmer, and a Tina Fey character, a robot and a fat hog could become governors, and god knows what kind of demented old men can become Senators, why not an alien? These aliens are really fun to do. It means I get to spend a lot of time thinking about the many ways I can take over the world, provided access to superior weapons technology and a pretty cool blue suit.

I had a really long, fun day and I am tired as hell. peace out!

Unconditional Surrender

And in the end, isn't an endless supply of free precious alcohol what most young people want? Why should aliens be any exceptions.
I would make more snarky/whiny/life-descriptory comments but I am so damn tired I can barely move. So I'm gonna crawl into my warm comfy bed and sleep :]

Nighty night world

Works Every Time

Used airline blanket: $5 (if you're flying Continental). Bottle of Smirnoff: $25. Easily defeating any organic alien race that thinks of invading Earth: priceless. In certain circumstances, depending on the energy exchange mechanisms of the invading organism, Smirnoff can be substituted with Ritalin, tobacco, Novocaine, oxygen or even sugar. And of course, if smallpox is unavailable we can always use the flu or streptococcus, those are immune to almost anything these days. If the alien does not accept blankets, try to make them try raw unsterilized eggs or not airport sushi. If the alien is a humanoid, sex is always a great way to transmit all kinds of infections.

Yes, I do in fact spend time thinking about this kind of stuff. And I try to instruct my brother as to what to do in an alien invasion. Let's face it, it's much more likely than a zombie invasion.

I think i'll start using my brother in my comics more often. He's fun to draw, and doesn't do much fun stuff so the comics might entertain him. Plus, he needs a shave.

OK all, peace out! And happy 1st of June.

Everyone's Saying It

It was the first thought in my head, and probably everyone else's. Poor Gary Coleman.

It's Not What You Think

It's ok. maybe the rumors are true and the world will end in 2012 or 1 year before the graduation of myself and my fellow sophomores. Either way, enjoy your summer, those without jobs, because you'll have deja vu in four years!
And I apologize for the delay. I had a really fun day yesterday so I got kind of tired by 4 am.

Good...day!

No Can Do

As Bilbo Baggins liked to say, nastly little things, adventures are. You end up late to dinner. Well, now there are video games to effectively kill any spirit of adventure left in the human brain. Sorry, fairies and Narnia lions. Better go digital soon, or your realms are doomed.

Good night!

Fear Machine

And  the book is most certainly going to be by Kurt Vonnegut. Because his dark comedy seems like a happy rainbowland compared to what's going on outside. Seriously, 500 channels and nothing on but bad news. Jesus H. Christ. Yeah...
But let's not forget that there's a lot of good in the world still! For example, that television could be attached to a console to play fun video games! And there are plenty of good books to read (does anyone still remember what a book is?). And also going outside and hanging out with your friends. If everyone could just chill the eff out and enjoy the good things, and help others to do so, the world would be a much better place.

Ok peoples i'm out! Leave a comment pretty please!

Facebook: the reason the patriot act is no longer relevant

Yeah, Facebook isn't actually private. What else is new. Actually, looking at people's stupid status updates on Openbook is quite fun. everyone should try it! ^_^

OK, good night!

House Riffs

In commemoration of another glorious House season finale. I won't be a spoiler to those who wait till next week, but Huddy supporters will be extra happy. Gotta love House! BTW ben if you want the episode tomorrow i can send it to you :)

Anyways everyone good night! My brother's using me for his lab experiments tomorrow, sounds like it's gonna be a lot of fun! :D

Nature Has A Great Sense of Irony

Oh, the molten irony. I prefer to think that the world IS going to end in 2012, because it will be a pleasant surprise when it doesn't. And then we can have a big and probably fatal we survived party!

To use my favorite phrase, Kurt Vonnegut wrote a good story about this. (Rest in peace sir, you're the man) If you like Kurt Vonnegut, holler! I think I should start a Kurt Vonnegut appreciation club.

Anyway summer vacation is upon us, us meaning the college world, sorry high schoolers, and I feel great! Still can't believe the year is over, but it sure is nice to do whatever I want all day long. Already missing my friends though.

OK, i'm out. Good night all!

Short People Run A High Risk of Substance Abuse

That's right. All of our favorite short people are addicts. Link is an alcoholic or a Ritalin enthusiast, depending which culture you subscribe to. Everyone knows the Mario brothers love their toadstools. Frodo is a god-knows-what, but sure acts as constipated as a heroin addict. Merry and Pippin? Total stoners. Seriously. They LOVE smoking pipeweed. I think the only clean one of that bunch is Samwise, and he has an eating disorder. Can you tell I just watched LOTR while making this comic?

Anyway, college is over for what Al Gore insists is "summer", and the lack of stress definitely shows positively on my work. Now its' sleepy time, and nobody will disturb me, cos they can't get to my bed. My room is literally impenetrable under all my stuff that I didn't have tiem to put away.

I LOVE YOU ALL! and thank you for your support. making a comic is a lot harder than it seems, so any support, or coffee, or hugs are much appreciated :)

Size Matters And Don't Believe Anyone Who Tells You Otherwise

So Stephen Hawking contends that if aliens do exist, we don't want them here because they will enslave us with their superior technology. Of course, as everyone less nerdy than he knows, there is always the issue of size. It's hard to be an alien conqueror if your intelligent conqueree would just step on you. Although, sometimes I doubt the intelligence of human beings. Case in point, the strato pen. As the Russians bewilderedly pointed out to the Americans, who invented this pen that works in zero G, "pencil."